sex is a lot like a hot bath
once you get your balls in the worst part’s over and you can get your torso and arms and stuff in
i’ve never had sex
do u ever go to school confident in what ur wearing and then u actually get there and ur kind of just like wow well this was an awful idea
“teenagers skip breakfast because they think it will help them lose weight” ACTUALLY NO THATS BULLSHIT TEENAGERS SKIP BREAKFAST SO THEY CAN MAKE IT TO SCHOOL ON TIME WITHOUT WAKING UP AT 4 IN THE MORNING
this is how my family greets new friends to the house.
Apparently, this was the guy who was deported for being too handsome.
Suddenly, I understand.
I DO find myself inspired to commit indecent acts of lasciviousness.
imagine if butterflies breathed fire
but only a little bit of fire
“hi pet butterfly would you light this candle for me?”
“thanks little buddy”